Dear Abby: Stepdad-teacher doing a bad job at both

Dear Abby I m getting married soon and I am very excited It is a true blessing I love my fiancee very much and I m happy to spend the rest of my life with her I have one concern though and it is about her daughters They are great girls Both are teenagers I have advised them I will be whatever they want me to be trying not to force any kind of relationship on them that they are not ready to have My dilemma is I am their facilitator at the high school I have excellent relationships with both girls but in an effort to make things as settled for them at school as I can I have distanced myself from the other students I have become grumpier and I m fleetly becoming the facilitator with a lot of homework that all the students dislike I was unfailingly the nice coach so this is a big change for me However I have done it because the girls are grateful for it The meaner I am at school the better my relationship with the girls is at home The other girls in their classes gossip a lot and they have mentioned various disturbing things about me to the girls because I am marrying their mom Am I doing the right thing I m beginning to be unhappy at work but it is making my home life very nice with my brand-new family Professor Mean in the West Dear Prof Mean The right thing Have you discussed this cockamamie plan with your principal What is positive about going from being liked by your students to distancing yourself in order to turn your fiancee s daughters into mentor s pets If this continues they will be social pariahs You should not have to choose between being popular at school or liked by your soon-to-be stepdaughters In just a insufficient years they ll be out of the house and you will be the the bulk disliked lecturer at the school if you are still employed there Dear Abby I solicited a woman I know out for coffee She politely declined I replied that I hoped my asking didn t make things awkward between us and that we could continue being friends She agreed and our friendship continues I m in my early s I m guessing she s in her late s or early s I have perpetually revealed more mature women to be attractive We talk or text each other and when the weather is nice we talk outside We truly had that coffee lately which was platonic unless I missed a sign she was putting out there Abby do you think societal pressures hold people back from pursuing relationships Should I try to stick closer to my age range Ready and Willing in New York Dear Ready There are any number of reasons why people hold back from pursuing relationships Chief among them is lack of chemistry rather than age difference From what you have written you have been put in the friend category If you are looking for romance you will have to look elsewhere By sticking to your age range you will eliminate that one factor but not the others Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren also known as Jeanne Phillips and was founded by her mother Pauline Phillips Contact Dear Abby at www DearAbby com or P O Box Los Angeles CA